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  • Fiona Grignard

Process Communication, the personality test that changed my relationships.

  • Have you ever felt like you didn't understand some of your own behaviors?

  • Have you ever felt like you couldn't understand another person's thoughts, values or behaviors?

  • Have you ever wanted to be able to better predict your reactions or the ones of those around you?

  • How many arguments and misunderstandings could you have avoided if you and your interlocutor had understood each other from the start?

A personality model, what is it for?

Do personality tests mean anything to you? There are plenty of them on the market, you may have done one while at university or in a company you worked for, or even you may have ventured on your own to find a free version on the internet.

The purpose of the personality test or model is to get to know yourself better by following a canvas, a structure.

I probably have tried at least 10 personality tests by now (due to my psychology addiction ;-)). Between the MBTI or the enneagram, both super interesting but whose meanings I can never remember (I'm ENFP and Base 7. No idea what that means), the DISC that gave me the impression of sticking a label on my forehead, the RIASEC too focused on professional orientation, the Big5 that I cannot really use in practice and all the other tests more or less reliable, more or less easy, more or less trendy... in other words, I struggled to find one that I really wanted to apply to my life and recommend to my clients.

What is Process Communication?

The PCM, by its nickname, is a model of personality and communication which allows to know us in depth, to understand our ways of functioning and our intrinsic motivations, to nourish our psychological needs and to get out of our stressful behaviors.

In the end, a better acceptance of ourselves (and of others), more well-being in our life and less conflicts. Just that.

The Process Comm is at the same time a rich, sophisticated and fun model that you can use for yourself, in business, as a couple and in all life situations that require communicating with other people. In short, all the time.

How is it different from other free tests?

It is super complete and scientific. It is playful and not too complicated thanks to the scheme and colors. It does not make us fit into boxes and at the same time, the different categorizations are easy to remember.

Did you know? Not all personality types are made to go to space!

▶ NASA has used PCM in their astronaut recruitment process since the 1980s. It helps define whether candidates have the qualities necessary to survive long term in the stressful environment of the rocket. Because inevitably, once up there, there is no question of asking for a return shuttle (!).

How do I use PCM in my daily life?

I use it for everything.

For myself first.

I am more efficient because I know how to take care of myself, my psychological needs and my stress.

To communicate with my team, my relatives, "difficult" people.

When I understand the type of personality of my interlocutor, I manage to better adapt my message to speak to them "in their language", and obviously communication is much more fluid and harmonious.

To analyze and get out of my stressful behaviors.

The PCM taught me that there are 6 great ways to talk about the same topic and deal with stress. One is not better than the other. They are just different depending on our personality.

Understanding where the different reactions come from allows me to be more tolerant of others and especially to invite them effectively to come out of their stressful behaviors.

Here are some awareness and realizations that I have started incorporated in my life thanks to the PCM:

✔︎Within my own team, we all mainly have a harmoniser base. We take 10 minutes before our weekly meeting to tell each other about our weekend, it's an investment in the relationship, and they need it as much as I do. So I always plan meetings a little longer.

✔︎With another colleague, on the other hand, who has a thinker base, it is better to get to the point. Meetings are for work. The blabla is for the lunch break.

✔︎If my boyfriend, who has an imaginer base, is in a bad mood, it may be because he didn't have enough time for himself, alone, during the day. When I slip away for about twenty minutes to offer him this qualitative moment with himself, he gets his smile back (and the desire to see me!).

✔︎I also understood his need for structure (his second base is thinker) and I take more care to explain my organization of the week to him and to put things that I personally consider to be details in our common agenda. Far from wanting to control me, he actually just needs to know in advance.

✔︎He, on the other hand, understood that when I'm angry "leave me alone" never means "leave me alone" and that a hug accompanied by a little joke does wonders to calm me down.

✔︎When I am stressed, I can no longer make effective and precise decisions. My harmoniser base pushes me to try to please others, and in the end, my indecision comes back to me badly. In those moments, I now know how to get out of my stressful state and who to lean on to help me decide.

✔︎When I get ready for a coaching session, I have a little ritual that helps me concentrate: candles, essential oils in the diffuser, warm tea, my pretty notebooks and pens, a very soft sweater, and my noise-canceling headphones. I thought for a while that these were worthless little whims. I realize today how important it is for me to keep my 5 senses in harmony, which is not as important for other personality bases.

✔︎I also understand better the reactions of my father, who has a persister base, with whom I used to have a lot of disagreements - especially growing up during my rebellious adolescence. I also often (not all the time, the PCM is not a magic wand either!) use it to defuse our conflicts.

✔︎I also try to adapt my communication format according to the person in front of me. Voice notes for those who prefer the more real feeling of hearing my voice; speedy texts for those who need efficiency; long emails for those who dream of precision… and everything is much more efficient.

The PCM is the first test that really shed light on my personality which is both harmoniser (oriented sensations and emotions) and thinker (oriented thoughts and logic) and it allows me to deepen my communication and go much further in my relationships.

Click here if you want to read more about PCM.

Are you interested in PCM? Click here if you want to know exactly what I'm offering and don't hesitate to come and tell me about it!

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